Wedding Advice - Recent Questions
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Recent Questions:
My parents divorced, acrimoniously, several years ago and have barely spoken to each other since.I have asked my father to give me away, which he is delighted to do but my mother doesn’t even want him at the wedding. As a compromise, my father has suggested that my elder brother give me away and he just attends as a guest, but my mother has said that she won’t attend the wedding at all if he is there. Any ideas?
You need to explain to them that this is your big day and they should be mature enough to put their differences aside for one day at least. If they refuse to compromise they will not only spoil your day but might actually regret their behaviour afterwards when it is too late.
If all else fails, why not suggest that your father gives you away at the wedding as planned without your mother being there. Then your mother could attend the reception afterwards without your father attending.
It may seem like an impossible solution but bear in mind that there are very few mothers who will forego attending their daughter’s big day and it is very likely that she will back down eventually!
Things usually turn out to be not as bad as you first fear so try not to let it spoil your wedding day preparations.
It’s a delicate matter but most people will be understanding if you take the trouble to explain. It’s often a good idea to mention the expense involved as many folks will not want to cause a financial hardship on a newly married couple, especially these days.
As a compromise you could have a small intimate wedding with just your closest relations and a few select friends with an evening party where you can invite everyone else. Or even throw an informal celebration when you return from your honeymoon.
My dad has kindly offered to pay for our wedding but I am beginning to wonder whether it’s a good idea. We were hoping to have a small, intimate wedding ceremony and reception but my dad wants to invite people from his work and golf club. I barely know some of these people and the thought of them attending my wedding day is slightly off-putting. I am thinking of telling my dad that we appreciate his help but want to pay for everything ourselves. What do you think?If you do this you could hurt your dad’s feelings, he may not realise how you feel about this.
From his point of view it’s a proud day for him and naturally he will want all of his friends to be there. Perhaps you could have a chat with him and explain how important it is to keep your big day special.
As a compromise, you could still have an intimate wedding and just invite his friends to the reception.